“Dude! How was your Christmas break?” asked Bobby as I entered the break room on my first day back to work.
“Brutal bro. Melissa and I broke up on Christmas Eve.” I responded sitting down at the computer next to his.
“Are you serious? So I guess it was like the worst Christmas ever.”
“Not exactly…”
I went on to tell Bobby how I’d found out Melissa was cheating and how I felt more relieved than saddened by the whole experience. By the time the story was over, I was fully logged onto my work computer, checking my email and secretly wishing I could check my new MySpace account to see if I’d been friended by any of the local ladies.
“What do you mean?” I usually didn’t encourage his story telling, but if it was about Stacy and had any truth to it, I had to hear him out.
“You mean you don’t know?” he asked, reminding me why I don’t like to talk to him.
“Just tell me.” I said, impatiently.
“She’s getting deployed.” I paused, stunned.
“How do you know?” I asked, flustered. “How’s she gonna close on her house?”
“I heard the shift chief talking about it. I guess she’s been trying to get out of it because she has to close, but they’re sending her anyway. She does not want to go.”
“I’ll bet she’s devastated. She really wanted to be here to close on that house. What time’s she coming in tonight?”
“Coming in tonight? She leaves for the desert in two weeks. She’s on leave then she’s on a plane to the sand pit man. We won’t see her for another five months at least.”
“Five months?” In disbelief, I immediately logged off the computer and went on a hunt for information from a few more reliable sources.
After checking with the shift chiefs and supervisors, I found out that everything Gordon said was true. Stacy was on leave until a few days before her departure, just enough time to out-process and get on a plane going over the ocean. She had put a tremendous amount of time and effort into having her new house built and was devastated by the idea of not being able to close and begin to create a home with her own personal decorative touches. But, when it comes to the military, her time had come and there was nothing she could do but accept her fate and step on that plane…it’s what she signed up for.
I had heard enough stories to know that most of the assignments for aircraft mechanics were at an airport away from danger. But, many times to get from the hotel or barracks they used for lodging to the airport would require a convoy or travel through towns where stopping was not an option. The vehicle went full speed from point A to point B, and improvised explosive devices (IED’s) were a constant threat. Many of my fellow military co-workers had informed me of how far away from the action they were and how being deployed was no big deal, but for every five stories of safety there was one story of mortar rounds going off so loud they would shake the barracks like an earthquake.
My thoughts were in a tail spin. I began to envision what Stacy would be telling her family while they were sitting around the dinner table on the last week before her deployment. Was she scared? Or was she playing it down like it was going to be no big deal? I felt cheated. I was aware enough of the dynamic of our relationship to know that even though she was a big part of my life, I was a small part of hers, but why didn’t she tell me? I had to find out from Gordon in the break room? She couldn’t have sent me a text? Or given me a phone call? It wasn’t fair.
That night was one of the longest nights of my life. I cycled between selfishness and worry until I eventually coped with the idea that what was done was done, there was nothing I could do to change things, and the sooner I realized that her world didn’t revolve around me, the better off I’d be.
+ COMMENTS
add a comment